In part 1, I talked about how what we SAY makes a difference and how important it is to turn the ‘I don’t wants’ into 'I wants’. You can get good at saying what you want and still stay where you are. Because 'I want' doesn’t guarantee action.
It can make you really really clear, but it doesn’t mean you’ll get there.
How do you move closer to your dream once you know what you want?
Yes, you work out the next steps. Yes, you practice, write, re-write, cross out, change your mind, change it back, take violin lessons, spend money on an e-book and learn a lot, but that well-building company in the middle of Africa that you dream of still seems a long way off. You’re still feeling like 'little old you' and although you know what you want, it’s still seems like a massive ask.
You can jump start the process. You can focus on the road ahead and you can work out what’s holding you back.
Here’s my last example:
3. The power of 'I am'
The words with the most power are: I am.
'I am' helps you get into the mindset of already having what you want.
So take the ‘I want’ from before and change it to ‘I am’.
I agree, it might seem like a weird thing to do. You might feel as though you’re just pretending. But trust me, there are good reasons to do this.
1) You test out how you feel.
'I am ….' How do you feel when you say it? Hint - the good feelings are what we’re aiming for. Ask yourself how does it feel to be that thing, that person? You have to do a little imagining, and a little 'make believing'. But when we get ourselves into the feeling of being that person, it suddenly gives us a glimpse of where we are going. When we feel things, our whole body gets involved and our minds have to rewire. Seeing yourself as being in the position you WANT to be, by pretending you are already there, gives us a big boost to move us forward and to test out how much we really want it.
2) You identify what’s stopping you.
To get to the place where you’re living your dream, you’ll face the fears and challenges that are keeping you where you are now. I can almost guarantee you’ll have a voice pop up that contradicts the ‘I am’ statement you’ve just made. Don’t be discouraged by it. Instead, welcome it like an old friend. For it will give you insights into the beliefs you have to let go of and give you clues about what’s stopping you moving forward.
3) You get creative about your next steps.
Take Liz. She wants to run her own organic vegetable farm. Yet she is stuck in her 9-5 job without a plan and not knowing what to do next. When she begins to think in terms of 'I am an organic vegetable farmer' she asks herself: If I WAS that person, what would I do differently? Would I spend my weekend lying in bed feeling miserable or would I be getting ready for my first trade show? What would I need for that? What can I start doing now?
4) You realise it’s part of you.
When you begin to say this regularly, when you start liking how it sounds, it becomes part of you. So all this imagining you’re doing, it’s sort of 'practising for when it happens'. Useful right?
Yes, you’ll feel like a fraud at first. You’ll question yourself and wonder if you have the guts to do it. But you don’t have to say it out loud yet. You can just tell yourself in your room, say it under your breath at the supermarket or in the bath. The more you say it, the more you get familiar with how it sounds when you say it, how it sits in your world.
'I am' has power.