Who is on your Christmas gift list?
In amongst the wrapping and unwrapping, the eating and drinking and singing, I encourage you to ask yourself what you really want to give yourself as a gift as we near the end of 2014.
It doesn't necessarily have to be a physical item or service. It might be some time to yourself, a new experience or a pampering session.
It might be some new clothes or shoes.
It might be the course or lessons you’re thinking of booking for yourself, to achieve what you want to next year.
Great gifts are those which nourish us, support us and help us shine.
‘Shining' is when our eyes twinkle, we laugh freely and we feel like dancing: we feel alive.
But giving to yourself is selfish - right?
I used to think that giving yourself a gift was the ultimate in selfish greed. That’s not too strong a way of putting it - it’s a belief I held for many years, even unconsciously. Of course, I would buy myself something, but only if I ‘needed’ it - if it could be 'justified'.
I used to think that spending money or time just for myself - and for no reason - was an unnecessary indulgence. Something I shouldn’t do. There had to be a reason.
We think of people who are in poverty in the world and feel guilty for having so much already. We feel as though we have to put ourselves last in order to make up for their suffering.
But I’ve found it’s not true, it doesn’t work that way.
When I give good gifts to myself: a day off work, beautiful tools and objects to use, a message of love - whatever the gift is, it fills me up so I can give to others better. It helps me be at my best. I’m nicer to be around. I’m more grounded and I have a better perspective.
When I’m gentle with myself, it shows through me in my gentleness with others.
When I really rest, rather than ‘push on through’, I achieve my to-do list in half the time, even if it ends up being last [I so often forget this!]
My gift to myself this week
I’ve had a busy week this last week and Friday was supposed to be a day off as well, but I ended up replying to a couple of emails and listening to half of a webinar I wanted to catch.
I’d ignored the signs that I was ‘pushing through’ and ‘just’ doing things. ‘I’m just going to do this’ then I’m done, I say.
So yesterday, I stayed in bed for the best part of a day. I was tired and achey from a week of busyness and two nights of dancing. I just let go and let my body have its say. I honoured myself and my need to rest. I didn’t get up, despite it being a bright day with lots of potential.
There’s always more to do. But if you haven’t yet done all your Christmas shopping, you’ve received cards from people you haven’t remembered to send them to and you forgot to bring the mulled wine you said you were going to, let it go.
It doesn’t matter. Forgive yourself and give to yourself anyway. Give yourself time, space and fun this Christmas.
Let the shoulds go and savour the season.
Take some time to consider what wonderful, supportive and nourishing gift you can give yourself this Christmas and if you’d like to, please share in the comments below.