I made a scary phone call this morning.
On the surface it looked like a pretty innocuous phone call, but it was so much more than that. It was a big deal for me.
I could see what it meant to me, because I put it off for at least 2 hours.
In the last 2 years I’ve stepped out of my comfort zone again and again and again, facing challenges and discomfort. I asked my boss for part time work, I quit my job, I’ve had numerous sensitive, potentially, life-altering and heart wrenching conversations, I’ve moved countries, I’ve dealt with family illness, I’ve said no when it would have WAY easier to accept and say yes. I’ve worked through deep, buried pain and I’ve invested a LOT in my vision because I KNOW it’s what I’m here to do.
My clients are doing AMAZING things.
I own my message, I’m making the impact I envisaged.
I’ve created the life that I desired.
And I’ve literally wiped out whole patterns of behaviour that used to plague me.
I have learnt to step through my fear.
[So, actually, putting off a call for 2 hours is pretty good. In fact, a situation with shades of familiarity took me 2 months to get through and even then I bottled it and had to delay again by 24 hours. I’m decreasing the fear time!]
I sat down on the sofa, held my phone in my hand and the familiar feeling arose within me.
Arggghhhhh….I don’t want to DO THIS.
Fear is a sign we’re about to grow. It’s a step which has risk for us, but it also has AMAZING reward.
Stepping through fear is like a muscle that has to be exercised. (I know for some people the thought of exercise is yucky but bear with me…)
The first time you exercise in a long time is horrible. You feel exhausted after doing pretty much nothing, everything hurts.
But you feel REALLY good afterwards.
It’s the same with fear. And guess what, it gets EASIER.
It still happens.
The six steps I take to move through fear:
1) Admit that it scares the shit out of you. "I’m scared". That’s all you have to say.
2) Remind yourself that you’ve done scary things before and they turned out ok. The death slide in ’92 anyone?
3) Identify the worst thing that could happen. Ask yourself, what is this REALLY about?
4) Open up your lungs and get some oxygen in there.
5) Do the prep so all you have to do is press the button. (Maybe draft the email, put the number in your phone, work out the route there). Sometimes, kidding ourselves that we aren’t actually going to do can help us calm down before we take the leap.
6) Say F*ck it, and...and leap.
Yes, this is the final step and the scariest part. There is no way around it. You have to step THROUGH IT. But when you’ve done steps 1-5 over and over and are getting annoyed with yourself, you realise you’re not going to get anywhere unless you do it. It's a CHOICE.
(PS. Getting supported around this step REALLY helps, but only YOU can make that decision)
7) (Bonus step!) Celebrate! You DID it! What a winner! How will you spend time appreciating who you are?
What are you too shit-scared to do? Get support? Make the phone call? Tell your boss you're going to quit?
I can support you in stepping through your fear to create the life you want.
But you have to choose.
Will you? Take the first step and apply here