How not to feel powerless

"But I can't do anything about it!"

I hear this a LOT - from clients, strangers, even sometimes friends. 

I get it. 

I felt powerless for much of my life.

It's interesting looking back really because I was always a 'DO'er - you know, give me a 'to-do' list and I'll power (ha!) through it. 

Yet there were always areas where I couldn't find my way. Money. Dating and relationships. Saying what I really wanted to say. 

I felt powerless in the church and that's ultimately why I left. Even when I tried my best to please the ‘God’ I thought I had to serve, it didn't end well.

The circumstances I found myself in weren’t ‘my fault’ by any means (not even close) but they screwed with my head and heart. 

I was confused, miserable, hurt. 

I felt betrayed. 

Fast forward a few years. I had a job, a nice flat, working hard and playing hard. Yet still something was off. I felt as though I was on this treadmill and I was afraid to stop running. 

And I also knew that if I didn't stop soon, there would be a huge crash. 

Life just wasn't working for me.

I seemed to be living someone else's life, because that's what I thought I had to do.

There was a little crash.

Time off work. Crying. Lostness. Confusion. 

The shift came for me when I began to have a sense of my own power.  

A new spiritual path opened up to me.  

I say spirituality is another way to describe 'relationship to yourself’ and 'relationship to others’ or 'relationship to life'.

This new path was really just me realising that I had a relationship to mySELF as well as a relationship with everyone else.

I started using my POWER. 

But Claire..."Where is my power? " I hear you ask. 

"I’m just an underling, a worker, an employee." 

Here it is: You have power because you have choice. 

CHOICE ALLOWS US TO CREATE WHATEVER EXPERIENCE WE WANT.

When you feel powerless around your money, relationships, lifestyle or your health it can feel debilitating.

It can feel as though you’re trapped, stuck and as though everything is unfair. 

But it’s not. 

You can always choose. 

You don’t have power over feelings that arise within you but you have a choice as to how to respond. 

You can allow them to come, to work through and to change or you can suppress them. 

You can make them mean something about you or you can see that they are just feelings, they are valid as part of you but they do not MAKE you.

"I’m angry" we say. 

You’re not angry. You FEEL angry. We are the love behind the emotions and the anger. 

Underneath all my 'stuff', I had been afraid of the relationship to myself.

It felt dangerous to allow my true desires to be spoken out loud.

To say them even to my coach, who had no prior relationship with me, no prejudices, no pre-conceptions and agendas was scary. 

But that's what really needed to happen. And it felt SO good just to say it. THIS is what I want. 

To be real, to let the REAL me soar, I needed to use my power - my self. 

I invite you to consider what you feel powerless around and ask yourself if you’re willing to see the possibility to transform your whole experience there.

Are you willing to see that possibility? 

This transformation...so you feel excited about your life and eager to move more deeply into who you are.

How would that feel?