Know exactly what you want?


Last week we talked about positioning ourselves for change. So I'm wondering, if I asked you, could you tell me specifically what you want to change to? Exactly? In detail? No? Why not?

Why we don’t know what we want.

Sometimes we don’t know because we’ve been told dreams don’t come true. We’ve been fine so far, having done what we’re told, not got into trouble, people think we’re ok, we’ve got a good job, why would we risk it all for a mere inkling of something that seems selfish?

Sometimes we don’t know because we don’t let ourselves dream. We’re afraid it might not happen. We think that no dream is worse than a shattered dream. We hold back because we are afraid we won’t get it and we’ll die disappointed.

Why is it important to know what you want? Because otherwise your life ends up living itself for you. “It’s inevitable,” you say, and so it is. “I can’t do anything about it!” you cry. And so it carries on.

You know what happens if you let ten years go by like this?

You drift. You go along with the tide, being washed over, day in day out, doing the same things, finding yourself in a life that merely happens to you.

Imagine that driftwood one day decides to dig in. One branch plunges into the soft ground. Yes, sometimes it gets sucked back into the swell, being overcome by the waves and all the temptations and hasn’t got the strength to hold on. But it’s looking for soil to take root and one day it finds some. It starts. The roots begin to grow.

And yet, we know that doesn’t happen because although driftwood has a certain type of beauty it’s dead. It’s just being tossed around. It has lost it’s connection to the source - the thing that makes it come alive, the conditions for it to grow. It's just stuck in the sand, battered by the storms.

What happens when we know

You see, unlike driftwood, you’re not dead. You may feel as though there is no way for you to get out of the swirling sea that takes you away from where you want to be, you may feel as though you can’t fight it - the tide is too strong, you can find soil. You can draw on the life inside you and take root, grow strong.

So you need to know what makes you come alive. What you want. Know what you want and say it. Practice. “I want…” “I want…” I want to sing. I want to work with creative people. I want to be a pilot. You do know.

What does this give us?

Desire verbalised. Intention. It’s out there, even if no one but you heard it. And that’s your first root.

You say yes with your feet. You begin to create. You find ways. Miracles happen and mindsets shift. You do the smallest act of bravery and stand up for your dream and there is the first hint of a flower.

Trees aren’t meant to live in the sea. Trees are meant to have light and air and fresh water. Be grounded in soil and reach towards the sky. Not float around being worn down, little by little, aimlessly and listlessly wherever they're taken.

Know what you want so you can reach for it. What is it? A beach house or a city apartment? A hillside walk or a jazz concert? People focused or project focused? Blue or green polka dot? Freedom, space, travel. Peace. Contentment. Know all of it, down to the last detail. Your life. What you want.

It’s Christmas time and there may be a moment for you to have a ponder, perhaps after you’ve eaten and sat down to digest. Close your eyes and dream.